Long story short…I am still going. I have had to change the plan to meet my specific limitations BUT I am still going. I have never felt so OUT OF SHAPE as I do when I run. But that is the point…get back – or finally – into shape.
So, I have not had a seriously bad day in a really long time. I actually forgot what it was like to have one of those days when one thing happens and another thing follows and another little bad thing and then just something that you expected but hate happens on top of it. Well yesterday was that day. Details will not really be following. We all have those days in our life but I am writing because really, I have been blessed and it has been a while.
Every few minutes when I am dealing with the details of say…the auto accident Breanna had yesterday…I am reminded of the bad day and I have to say…God…just get me through this. Just get me through this one moment. I feel like I am saying it alot today. Every once in awhile I think my life really SUCKS but then you know what…it doesn’t. I am just emotionally at a place where I am a bit on edge so it amplifies everything I experience. I just have to keep talking to God. I know he won’t give me more than I can handle.
I will say that in the midst of it all, it was great being able to spend 90 minutes with a group of ladies that I love, who let me share and made me laugh. We need to have those friends who will lift you up when you feel down. God never intended for us to go through life alone.
It is not a small little bird like you might think. He (she?) is about the size of a small cat.
His feathers are actually quite beautiful.
Not sure what type of bird it is… a crow? blackbird? raven? I am no bird aficionado.
But the huge story about this bird is that…
It is dead.
This little fellow landed on the flower box outside of my parents home….and promptly froze to death in this position.
Facing their house.
They now have a new lawn ornament
We complain and grumble and drag ourselves into the chaos of winter.
Temperatures 15 degrees below zero
…and then there is the windchill factor but don’t go there.
Streets so cold and frozen that the salt won’t melt the ice and
double trailer semi trucks cant move forward once they come to a stop.
Cars wont start because the cold drains the batteries.
A wall of snow so high that you can’t see the buildings on the other side.
Layers of clothes that threaten to suffocate you
but are necessary to stay warm and even for some…to live.
Eventually the sun will come out.
When you stop and look around at the white wondrous landscape, when you look at it and realize that a snowflake is faceted in such a way that is sparkles as much as the most brilliant diamond, you realize that it too is a gift from God.
He is quite the artist. Like every great masterpiece, you don’t notice it’s brilliance until you take a moment to take it in.
What am I thinking!
A running plan! Am I insane! I am SOOOOO not a runner.
Last year during what I call “marathon season” I was envious and impressed by all of the people I knew that ran or walked or participated in a marathon. One of them even videotaped it!
I believe her video inspired me even. So I Googled a plan. From Couch Potato to 5k. Told someone that “Next year I want to run a 5k!” and ……carried the plan around for weeks in my tote. Woo Hoo! Way to go! Yay ME!
So over the weekend, I cleaned off my treadmill. (I have 5 bankers boxes stacked to prove it!) and proceeded to admire my handiwork. Can I clean off a treadmill or WHAT! YEE HA!
Monday, I worked 12 hours…I forgive me.
Today. I came home. Did the Snoopy Dance of Joy because my Netflix video came in and went in my room fully prepared to veg. But THEN…it came over me. The THOUGHTS.
The treadmill is clean.
No one is home.
Its only 3:30
Your comfy clothes are clean.
You OWN tennis shoes.
Wear the socks you wore yesterday…you’re just gonna sweat in ’em anyway.
YOU DONT HAVE TO BE ANYWHERE
YOU DONT HAVE ANYTHING ELSE THAT ABSOLUTELY MUST BE DONE
You know the plan
Well, you know you can Google the plan
Just Do It
So I did it. I DID IT! Workout #1 for a 5k running plan. I DID IT! YAY ME
My legs feel like what I imagine it would be like if I were walking around as a Jell-O cup (sans the plastic cup) rather than a human being. Thank you God for structure!
Seriously. WHAT am I thinking. Can I REALLY do this? Is this simply ONE MORE exercise plan that I will start and not finish because it is for me and not benefiting everyone or ANYONE else?
I feel great! My lungs are on fire, I am shaking all over, and I am wobbly as all get out, but I did it. I feel good about having done it. It was only 20 minutes…well 22 because I insisted on not stopping on a partial mile, but still. A blurp in time. No big.
Please God let me continue this. (As if YOU wouldn’t let me do THIS.) Okay, better prayer…God please help me allow myself to keep doing this. Help me stay out of my way.